Tevije un Mir - Text fragments

Enter the little Violinist. He arranges his cart, some stools and a few objects on stage, then tunes his violin and runs off. The lights rise slowly as the company comes on stage and prepares for rehearsals. A few minutes pass and a Stage Servant enters, he stumbles about in the search for something strong to drink. He finds a bottle and drinks, he is transformed. He has been possessed by a Dybbuk. He approaches the figure of the Automaton.

Automaton: Reb Sholem Alekhem, reb Sholem Alekhem!

Everyone on stage looks around to see where the voice is coming from.

Automaton: Reb Sholem Alekhem, reb Sholem Alekhem, vos tut ir?

Moni: I'm putting on my make-up, reb Tevye.

Automaton: Shminke??? Purim iz nisht a bisl tsu vayt, reb yid?

Moni: You're right, reb Tevye. Purim is still a while off.

Automaton: Nu???.... Ir zayt nisht reb Sholem Alekhem. Ver zayt ir?

Moni: My name is Moni Ovadia... Shloimele Ovadià

Automaton: A sheyner nomen, ober ...

Moni: I'm a Sephardi Jew, reb Tevye.

Automa: A sfardisher yid? Un vos tut ir do? Ir, zayt mir moychl, ir zet nisht oys vi a sfardisher yid, ir zayt ongeton vi mir, ir zeyt oys vi a korev mayner, yo, ir zayt azoy enlakh tsu mir. reb Shloyme ... ir zayt maskim oyb ikh ruf aykh azoy?
Moni No! Certainly... Well... You see, reb Tevye, I'm an actor... Theatre!
Automa: An aktior, reb Shloyme? Teater? Vos far a teater?
Moni Theatre... Yiddish theatre, in a way.
Automa: Vos heysst, azoy tus zogn? nu? nu?
Moni Nu! Nu! In a certain way, reb Tevye, it's better not to ask.
Automa: Ah! Ah! Zeyer interessant... take zeyer interessant, un ...
vu iz ayerer teater?
Moni In Italy, reb Tevye.
Automa: Italye? I-t-a-l-y-e, vos far a min plats iz dos?
A stodt? A shtetl?
Moni: It's a country, reb Tevye, a nation. To the south of France.
Automa: Ah, ah! Yene Italie???? Interessant, take interessant, a shlug vodke, reb Shloyme?
 

A brief pause. The Stage Servant produces a bottle from one of his pockets and gulps down a drink in a gesture from the "Barber of Siberia". Not yet satisfied, he gulps down another.